apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
He felt like a one man threesome
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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