my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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