He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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