a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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