? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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