Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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