please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I got inside last night via doggy door
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
