I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
