Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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