whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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