i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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