K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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