i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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