Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
