Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
