So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
