i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
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I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet