Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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