Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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