I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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