Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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