i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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