just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I would fuck him just for his dog
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
