1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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