Is it normal to miss your booty call?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize