I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
