Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
