You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
