I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
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May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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