apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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