It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
