I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
