There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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