I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
