This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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