She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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