Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs. http://tfl.nu/152p
  Replies (9) Good night (2437) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute. http://tfl.nu/qqzp
  Replies (147) Good night (1676) Bad night (3934)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  wtf?

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now. (412): wtf? (610): Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit. http://tfl.nu/b93y
  Replies (22) Good night (968) Bad night (3598)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday. http://tfl.nu/laq5
  Replies (29) Good night (6804) Bad night (1343)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies. http://tfl.nu/mtcu
  Replies (50) Good night (6775) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends" http://tfl.nu/u7q7
  Replies (27) Good night (6257) Bad night (965)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun? http://tfl.nu/ilq6
  Replies (3) Good night (2847) Bad night (1177)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring http://tfl.nu/7l8r
  Replies (9) Good night (2343) Bad night (827)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers http://tfl.nu/nh9s
  Replies (19) Good night (4302) Bad night (1683)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call. http://tfl.nu/ftpa
  Replies (18) Good night (2542) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom http://tfl.nu/cd2y
  Replies (7) Good night (1488) Bad night (2792)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats http://tfl.nu/ivyy
  Replies (0) Good night (383) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me. http://tfl.nu/u3mn
  Replies (2) Good night (609) Bad night (313)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy http://tfl.nu/zec6
  Replies (11) Good night (1142) Bad night (302)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  She looks like a beluga.

  (954): View more from Florida

  I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): She looks like a beluga. (954): I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched" http://tfl.nu/1qo8
  Replies (1) Good night (469) Bad night (402)

Randomize