Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.

  (1-831): View more from California

  stop. you already have a dog

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company. (1-831): stop. you already have a dog http://tfl.nu/bxqv
  Replies (8) Good night (984) Bad night (1868)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control http://tfl.nu/izk5
  Replies (46) Good night (808) Bad night (8396)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places? http://tfl.nu/i464
  Replies (39) Good night (6203) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made. http://tfl.nu/87yq
  Replies (111) Good night (46690) Bad night (2743)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself http://tfl.nu/96ze
  Replies (70) Good night (7028) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car. http://tfl.nu/fzr7
  Replies (18) Good night (5657) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college. http://tfl.nu/bhs0
  Replies (12) Good night (3833) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college http://tfl.nu/eldf
  Replies (32) Good night (5697) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package.. http://tfl.nu/0izj
  Replies (37) Good night (6969) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like http://tfl.nu/ol8k
  Replies (72) Good night (12785) Bad night (1286)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you. http://tfl.nu/fon6
  Replies (9) Good night (888) Bad night (3944)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (229): dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes http://tfl.nu/v2kt
  Replies (2) Good night (700) Bad night (1361)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions. http://tfl.nu/alli
  Replies (8) Good night (1889) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it! http://tfl.nu/qsog
  Replies (10) Good night (2244) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete http://tfl.nu/c68q
  Replies (2) Good night (441) Bad night (788)

Randomize