i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
