Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize