im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Sober January is a disaster.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
