She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
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I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
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We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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