Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
