Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I bet he comes in French.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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