WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize