So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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