U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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