I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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