69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
