The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Oh god it's open bar.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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