brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
